Dear jerk off,
I'm sorry that the EIGHTY miles an hour I was traveling on Interstate 880 this afternoon wasn't fast enough for you. There really was no need to get so close to my bumper and flick your lights and pass me so damn aggressively. That really is rude. Next time, just pass me, and speed on to where ever it is you are in such a damn hurry to get. I truly hope you make the most of the 2 minutes you save. I'm sure it'll take longer than that for your blood pressure to return to normal once you reach your destination.
Sincerely,
The slowpoke in the Quest
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